Tarrant's Atonement
by Niphuria
Summary: Tarrant needs Alice to punish him so that he can atone for the past. But she wants to redeem him and make him believe in the both of them. Dedicated to Amaranth who helped me with ideas and polishing, and to CeliaEquus for her support and kindness.


I don't own Alice in Wonderland or any of its characters. Based on the 2010 Tim Burton film.

Rated M for explicit adult content. Special warning - some torture and bdsm. Nothing too hardcore, but some readers probably should stay away from this.

Tarrant needs Alice to punish him so that he can atone for the past. But she wants to redeem him and make him believe in the both of them. Will she succeed?

**Tarrant's Atonement**

Tarrant hadn't realised the extent of pain that the small portion of acid he had placed into the dye bottles would cause. Yet, he found that he didn't mind it. As Alice cut his flesh with the scoring knife and dabbed the dye into each cut the pain seared his entire backside even though, in reality, it was only on one buttock.

Or was the pain caused by his desire to experience it, and in great quantity, at his Alice's hands? As she cut and cut and dyed and dyed he began to wonder, through the tears that blinded his vision and the muffled sounds of his cries and moans, if he was, besides serving his penance, enjoying being dominated and completely at Alice's mercy?

She had been at her work for several hours, yet a part of him wanted it to last several more. At least. He had never felt such burning, stinging and constant pain, but he craved it. Needed it. Needed it as much as he needed Alice and air and food and tea. And hats.

Suddenly it stopped. He heard Alice say something about her being finished with his Mark and that is was beautiful. He vaguely felt her bandage the Mark and place the items she had used on a shelf. His tears stopped and dried. And Alice still hadn't moved. Why? What was she thinking? What was she waiting for?

Then he saw a blur of blue as she raced out of the room. He barely had time to wonder at this when she returned with something folded in her hands. She bent down before him and stared into his wide eyes.

"Tarrant, I love you. I love you more than my own life! More than anything I could name! But you made me do this. You made me hurt you. Yes, we are equals now, in a sense. But in making you pay for what you did to me you also controlled me again."

She looked angry and tears blurred her lovely blue eyes. "Tarrant, I've decided that since you are already here and you are so very lovely and ready and ripe for punishment and atonement, I'll give it to you. In spades. And this time it isn't because you are manipulating me, but because I want to do it. I want to really make you pay and make you realize that I won't tolerate you forcing me to submit to your every desire!"

She opened her hands and Tarrant saw what she was holding. It was his belt.

"I'm going to punish you, Tarrant Hightopp. I'm going to punish you because I want to and because I can. And then you will never, ever, force me into such a thing as you have tonight upon me ever again! And while I'm doing this you will think about what I've said and think on what you've done and why!"

Alice smiled when she saw his eyes flicker with the lime green and flecks of grey that betrayed his surprise and confusion. She slowly walked away from his head and went to the back of the table where his legs were tied spreadeagled. She unrolled the belt and held it so that about a foot and a half was ready for use, the buckle held tightly in her fist along with the rest of the bunched up leather.

Yes, Mirana was right. There was both Light and Darkness in everyone. Right now she was going to be Dark and embrace it. Then later she could let it go, having released it upon Tarrant, who she knew was craving it and needing it. Then, and only then, could they begin to move towards the Light and towards their proper Balance. She would see to it.

Alice raised the belt and brought it down sharply upon the inside of one pale thigh and Tarrant yelped through his gag. Alice didn't mind hearing him now so she removed the cotton from her ears. He was gagged quite thoroughly, so his cries would remain very muffled.

Yes, a very satisfying red mark was rising. She struck him again and again and took satisfaction as he cried out at every sharp crack of the stinging leather. She could sense his pain and his fear, yet something...something made her to want to give it to him because it pleased her to be in control this time; but knowing that he was craving it was permissible. It made it all the easier for her to punish him. Yes, easier, but not...easy. Tears still blurred her vision as she doled out her Justice upon him. Tears of guilt that she could do so, and tears for Tarrant's pain, and tears of frustration because Tarrant craved pain, and, finally, tears of determination that this would all work out in the end and they could bring this entire episode of their lives to a proper conclusion.

She lashed his left thigh until it was entirely red and welts were rising. Then Alice slowly moved to the other side of the table and smartly lashed his right. Tarrant cried out again and she wasn't moved as she saw his tears dripping onto the floor. He didn't fool her. He wanted this, and oh, she would give it to him! Crack after crack on his thigh until he was straining and pulling in vain at the ties that held him immobile. Yes, she remembered the feeling! She remembered how she felt when her muscles ached yet she couldn't help but pull helplessly against her bindings. Oh, yes, she remembered. Now, she just had to hold on to her Muchness to carry her through the remainder of what she had to do.

When she had finished with his right thigh she waited and allowed Tarrant to rest and recover a little. He was panting and his entire body was covered with a sheen of perspiration. Lovely. He was...lovely. Alice was surprised that she could enjoy his beautiful body even in pain. But she did. Mostly because Tarrant wanted and needed it, but also because...yes. Because she herself was embracing a portion of Darkness and that Darkness was allowing her to enjoy being completely dominant over him. With these thoughts in mind, Alice prepared herself for the next round.

Tarrant had never felt anything like this. Each crack of the leather against his tender flesh was agonizing. It felt as if he were on fire! He wanted her to stop and show mercy; yet at the same time, he felt as if he would die if he received it. But what was she going to do...

Crack! He practically screamed when she struck him across his buttocks. She apparently didn't care that she struck his Mark, for it was covered with a protective bandage. Before he could even absorb that thought she struck him again, this time the leather grazed his...tea-sack, and this time he did scream. It barely sounded through his mouthful of cloth. Alice corrected her aim and snapped the leather across his scut again and again. He both hated and loved when she struck a spot she had already graced with the leather. His own belt, of all things! He felt like a horse being whipped by a cruel owner; yet he perversely loved every moment. He silently begged her for more and she gave it to him. She punished his backside until he knew he wouldn't be able to sit comfortably for many days.

Alice was proud of the deep crimson his lovely, rounded backside was becoming. She would not lash his back, however. The scars that Stayne had left there with his whip were not something she enjoyed seeing, much less even considering touching with harshness.

She moved back down to the end of the table and then shortened the leather to about six inches. When she whipped the souls of his feet he cried out and struggled violently at his bindings. But she didn't stop until he stopped struggling. Crack! Slap! The sound was satisfying to Alice. It began to soothe her inner rage at being coerced into Marking him. It began to sooth away the trauma of the ordeal in making him serve a penance, even though she realised that Tarrant had no idea that he was manipulating her. He had simply wanted to atone so he could accept her love and her forgiveness. But Alice knew what he hadn't consciously realised, and she was going to use tonight to begin to correct his thoughts and behaviour. Within reason, of course. She did not wish to change who he was, just help him ease away from the Darkness of his fears and insecurities with her. She would use it to begin to bring him towards being the confident man he had every potential of being.

Tarrant sighed with genuine relief when Alice stopped and placed the belt on a shelf. She moved back to his face and knelt before him. She cupped his head in her hands and kissed him on his gagged mouth. Then she tenderly kissed his eyelids, forehead, and then his cheeks. She drew back and their gazes locked.

"Tarrant, I'm not quite finished with you. Almost, but not quite." She stroked his cheekbones and gently wiped the last of the tears from his face. "I want you to think on everything you've done and everything I've done. And I want you to think on why I'm so angry at how you've manipulated me and how you are not going to do that anymore! And I want to you think on this, Tarrant Hightopp; you're going to let me help you! You're going to let me help you out of your fears and insecurities and help you find your Light and your Muchness again!"

She had one other surprise in store for him. She slowly disrobed right before his eyes. She slowly, so slowly, untied the lacing at the top of her blouse and pulled it over her head, her flushed and perspiring naked breasts bouncing as she did so.

Oh, by the White, let him taste those nipples! Just a little, he silently begged her. But she only smirked at him as she slowly eased off her skirt and pantalettes. Naked, save for her half-boots and socks, she moved right up to him, allowing him to smell her moist and musky sex. She was so close his nose could nuzzle into the soft curls there. He eagerly pushed it into her, inhaling her unique fragrance and just as he brushed against her clitoris she backed away.

"No, no! Not now. You haven't yet learned your lesson," she said. "Oh, but it's all right, Tarrant, I'm here to help! You'll see."

And to her own disbelief and his, she leaned back against the wall only several feet away and began to rub and squeeze her breasts. She closed her eyes and sighed as she thought of everything she had just done to Tarrant and her nipples hardened at once, despite the heat of the room. She opened her eyes and gazed straight into his green-golden ones; the ones that showed his passion and lust, and began to earnestly play with her nipples.

"You're so beautiful, Tarrant," she said in a husky, almost breathless voice. "See the effect you're having on me?" She pinched, squeezed and tweaked her nipples until they were bright red and then showed them to Tarrant. "See? See how you're making me feel? How you're filling me with desire?"

Tarrant impotently struggled against his bindings again, so frustrated that he was now growling through his gag. Is this how he had made her feel all those months ago? Had she been even half this mad with lust? Well, yes, she must have been, he reasoned. She had been angry and frustrated when he'd brought her so close to orgasm and then just stopped and left her wanting, needing, frustrated and quivering with unsatisfied desire. It was not a pleasant way to be left at all. He understood now.

She raised her right leg and lay her foot on the table alongside his head and began to stroke her already wet slit. She closed her eyes again and moaned softly as she began teasing herself to an even higher level of pleasure.

"Oh, yes," she sighed, "yes, I have Tarrant tied and helpless! I've Marked him and lashed him. And now all he can do is watch me..." And she stopped speaking as she stroked her tiny nub of pleasure very hard and fast. Small circles and then upward and downward quick strokes. "Watch me...yes..." She opened her eyes and they were passion-glazed. She locked eyes with Tarrant.

Tarrant had never been so aroused! His erection was painful beneath him against the unforgiving wood. He tried to move his hips but could barely do so. All he could do was press down to try and bring about his own orgasm.

But Alice suddenly stopped and raced to his side and grasped him by the tea-sack "You do and I swear I'll whip that, too!" she threatened, "and this!" With a painful squeeze she made her point. The shot of pain through his sack made his erection begin to wane at once.

"Now, where was I? Oh, yes." Alice resumed her former position and placed one hand on a flushed breast and the other into her slick sex. She pushed her back into the wall even harder and closed her eyes again and turned her head to one side.

Oh, those moist blonde curls, the gorgeous flushed face, her panting breaths from her lush pink lips, the wildly beating pulse at her throat... Tarrant could hardly bear to witness it, despite the pain in his nether region. And then her breathing quickened even more. Transfixed, Tarrant couldn't tear his eyes away as Alice brought herself to a shuddering climax that made her cry out in an animalistic way that he had never heard from her before. What was so different? Was it because she had just pleasured herself? No...it...it was because she was aroused by his helplessness! She was aroused and allowing a Dark part of herself to delight in it, just as he had delighted in tormenting her that Fateful night!

After a few moments of deep and calming breaths Alice smiled at him. "Well, I certainly had fun. Did you?"

* * *

After his limbs were fully functional again Tarrant sheepishly approached Alice, who was in the kitchen calmly sipping tea. "Um...Alice? Sweetling?"

She looked up at him impassively. "Yes, Tarrant?"

"I...I just want to...to..."

Alice stood and looked up into his face. Then she slapped him sharply across his left cheek. Tarrant stumbled.

"I...I know I deserved that, but..."

"But what? Do you even know _why_ I slapped you, Tarrant?"

Tarrant knew that he had to be truthful. He had absolutely no idea why she had slapped him. He shook his head.

"Because I want you to stop being timid. I want you to stop feeling guilty. I want you to stop all the worry and insecurity and learn to trust me. And yourself." She took his face in her hands and locked her gaze to his. "What is it you want right now, Tarrant?"

Tarrant swallowed hard. "I want you. In bed."

"That's better," Alice purred. "Yes, Tarrant, let's go to the bedroom. And while we're there, take what you want. Do you understand me?"

"Yes," he sighed, drawing her to him for a long, heated kiss. This was the first time she had allowed him to touch her since she had released him from his bondage on the table. "Yes, Alice, my love, I'll take what I want."

On the way to the bedroom they shed their clothes and by the time they tumbled onto the bed they were naked and beyond impassioned.

Despite the lingering discomfort in his tea-sack Tarrant was already aroused. His Alice was flushed and panting and so eager he could scare believe it. He pushed her towards the centre of the bed and climbed between her legs. He claimed her lips and persuaded them to part with his eager tongue. He invaded every possible space in her Alice-mouth that he could. She tasted of honey and rose and tea and, of course, Alice. She grasped his soft orange hair tightly and pulled his head to her breasts.

Her gasps encouraged him and he was so excited he rained feverish kisses all over those luscious mounds.

"More," she whispered.

He complied. Tarrant began to suckle her flesh and knew he would leave marks but he didn't care. She wanted this as badly as he did! She arched her back towards him, urging him on. When he began to nip the rosy tips of her breasts she groaned in pure delight. Her strawberry-cream nipples just begged to be tasted, laved, nipped, and suckled. She squirmed against him in delight and he smiled and moved up to her throat.

"Oh, yes, Tarrant," she moaned. "This is...ahhh..."

He pressed an open-mouthed kiss on her most sensitive spot and she stiffened with the sensation. She made soft purring sounds of pleasure. He continued to kiss and nuzzle that spot on her throat.

"More, Tarrant, please!"

He gave her more, sucking and nipping at her soft flesh even harder, but Alice was shaking her head, blonde curls tumbling about. "I said more, Tarrant! Please, harder! More!"

He tried to comply and began to scrape his teeth along her neck. She liked this and leaned into him, clutching his shoulders tightly and groaning. "Yes, yes! Harder!"

"Alice, I'll hurt you if I do!"

Alice curled her fingers into his hair until she had a tight grip. "Like this, Tarrant!" She pulled his teeth across the side of her throat. He worried about bruising her, or even... And it happened. His teeth scraped into her vulnerable flesh so hard that he suddenly tasted the metallic flavour of her blood!

Tarrant gasped and pulled back. "I've done too much! I've hurt you, Alice! You're bleeding!"

Alice did not care. "Tarrant, don't stop! This is what I want!" When he hesitated, she forced his head down again until he once more was grazing her flesh and tasting her blood. Her sounds of satisfaction reassured him.

After a few moments he was beyond caring as well. He lapped at her blood while he kissed her, and then he moved lower down her body, kissing and sucking and nipping her skin all the way down to her core. He drew back and gazed at her wet centre but she stopped him.

"Please, Tarrant, just take me now! Take me as hard as you want! Any way you want!"

Any way he wanted? Very well. He turned her over and slapped her rear. "On yer hands and knees," he growled. Alice complied and Tarrant grasped her hips and before Alice could prepare he had plunged into her in one hard, deep thrust. She gasped in pain but didn't protest, she even lowered her head by resting on her elbows instead of her hands. This gave Tarrant even easier access to her sweet passage and Alice more receptivity to the sensations.

Alice was surprised at how much she was enjoying their rough love play. When Tarrant continued thrusting into her it hurt, but it hurt in such a lovely and appealing way. He was doing as she asked, taking her hard and rough, but she could feel that he was enjoying it, too. His low growls of pleasure and his fingers digging into her hips told her so. He plunged into her so hard his hips slapped against her rear and she had to struggle to keep her balance on the mattress. As she struggled to keep balance her ears were filled with the roar of her own rushing blood and the sound was incredible! After he had pumped into her for several minutes her pulled out and told her to roll onto her back.

Alice did so and parted her legs eagerly, but Tarrant grasped her knees and pressed her legs upwards until her feet were along-side her head. Then he gazed at her with a dark, feral gaze and plunged into her again. Alice gasped. This position was deep, too, but in a different way! They had never loved like this before. When the pressure of his thrusting increased Alice felt a stinging pain as he slammed against her cervix but she didn't want him to stop! And again, to her surprise, his pelvis was thrusting against her rear once more! She almost giggled in maniacal glee. She could hardly think as the sensations of pleasure and pain were overwhelming her, but one thought did seep into her mind. Her experience at Tarrant's hands when he had abducted and Marked her, and her Marking him in return had changed her.

Not for every time they would make love, however, but sometimes. At least sometimes. Yes, she wanted to embrace this Dark need for pleasure and pain. The combination was absolutely exquisite! And Tarrant's confidence in taking charge of her tonight, (finally!) was thrilling beyond compare.

Tarrant pulled out of her and pressed his white-lavender-purple erection against her lips. "Open tha' bonnie mouth o' yers an' tek meh!" he burred sharply.

At once Alice obeyed and was surprised when, instead of sliding into her mouth gently and carefully, he plunged into her throat as roughly as he had her body. She had to relax as quickly as possible to keep from choking and to allow him to continue. Once or twice she gagged for a moment and when she did she heard a different sound of pleasure from him. She knew he didn't want to choke her, yet the constricting muscles of her throat obviously felt good around him. He kept up the rough pace until her jaws were aching. There was simply so much of him! All of a sudden he went rigid and his seed, tasting like blueberry wine, spurted into her throat and Alice swallowed it down eagerly. She didn't even mind that her own release hadn't come.

But she was taken by surprise. Tarrant quickly and smoothly slid down to her sex and, keeping her thighs upwards, he pressed his face into her and began to tongue and suck and nip her as roughly as he had her breasts. And since her breasts were definitely going to bruise Alice had no doubt she would bruise down there as well. And she didn't care! He pointed his tongue and tickled her clitoris at the same time he bit down on it and she came. She came so hard that she went blind for the first time in her life! Her body shuddered and quivered as Tarrant continued to sweetly torment her and all she could do was bear it. Just as her vision was returning he bit her again and she climaxed again, going blind once more.

Tarrant then lowered her legs and pressed his mouth to hers and both tasted themselves on each other's lips. Their rough and almost desperate kiss slowly began to become tender and gentle. Alice's vision returned and she marveled at how wondrous their lovemaking had just been. They had never been passionate in this way before; so free and wild! So utterly natural and giving and taking. It was absolutely perfect!

Tarrant gently traced her lips with his finger and gazed into her glowing blue eyes with his violet ones, the ones he had when he was feeling his most loving and protective.

"Alice," he gently lisped. "I love you! You know that, don't you?"

"Of course, why would you ask such a silly question?"

"Because...you...I hurt you. I made you bleed! Alice, I know why you wanted this. It's because of what I did to you!"

Alice placed a finger over his lips. "Tarrant, this isn't your fault. Maybe that day changed me, but I'm happy! I'm happy to be free to be passionate and wild once in a while. And I want you to know that I trust you completely. Now, I also need for you to trust me completely. And I think today is the perfect day for that, Tarrant. Do you?"

Tarrant considered. He had descended into Darkness and hurt Alice because he hadn't trusted her to come to him freely. He had served his penance, but in demanding that he serve it by her hand, he had manipulated Alice again. But she had forgiven him and loved him and demanded that he take what he wanted. And he had. And she had demanded of him and he had done as she wished and pleased her! And he had demanded of her and she gave to him!

She wasn't going to go anywhere ever again. She was going to stay with him. She was going to marry him. Half Mad or More Mad, she was going to stay with him. She loved him unconditionally; the good with the bad. The Mad and the Sane. The entire package that was him.

And Alice, she was Light and good. A little Dark but mostly Light. She forgave freely and punished without mercy when she had to. She did what she had to do, even when she hated herself for it, to help him. She accepted him and now, with her slight Darkness, Tarrant felt himself rising more to the Light inside of him. He loved and accepted the entire package that was his Alice.

He looked at her with bright emerald eyes and smiled.

"Yes."

She smiled.

* * *

This is the conclusion of this particular storyline. I hope you all enjoyed it! I'll really have to see if I can combine this into one story instead of 3 separate parts. All comments are welcome.


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